A Blues for Nina

I watched “Love Jones” this weekend for the first time and this poem got me feeling as if it was written to me. My imagination ran wild after it, so you can expect more coming for me soon.
This is for every girl… So you too can feel a little special and shine the only way you know how to… YOUR way. Enjoy!

Say baby, can I be your slave
I’ve got to admit girl, you’re the shit girl
And I’m diggin’ you like a grave
Now do they call you daughter to the spinnin post, or
Or maybe Queen of 2,000 moons
Sister to the distant, yet risin’ star
Is your name Yimmy-Ya
Oh hell nah, it’s got to be Oshun
Ooo, is that a smile me put on your face child
Wide as a field of Jasmine and Glover
Talk that talk honey, walk that walk money
Hound legs that’ll spank Jehovah
Shit, who am I?
It’s not important
But they call me Brother to the Night
And right now
I’m the blues in your left thigh
Tryin to become the funk in your right

Who am I?
I’ll be whoever you say
But right now, I’m the sight raped hunter
Blindly pursuing you as my prey
And I just wanna give you injections, of sublime erections
And get you to dance to my rhythm
Make you dream archaetypes, of black angels in flight
Upon wings, of distorted, contorted, metaphoric jism
Come on slim
Fuck yo’ man, I ain’t worried about him
It’s you who I wanna step to my scene
Cause rather than deal with the fallacy
Of this dry ass reality
I rather dance and romance your sweet ass, in a wet dream
Who am I?
Well they all call me Brother to the Night
And right now, I’m the blues in your left thigh
Trying to become the funk in your right
Is that alright

Follow me on twitter @NickyyDee_

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If You Don’t Mind

Please excuse my obsession, my infatuation, my need to have you near.
Please understand that it is not meant to scare you away or make you feel uncomfortable… Or awkardly make things awkward dear.
If you don’t mind, I’d like to pour out my however many page letter.
I’d like to tell you how impossible you make my life, how hard you make it for me to make sense of the world around me lately, how difficult it is for me to see past you.
If you don’t mind I’d like to tell you about what you make me feel.
How I look at your brown eyes and see my whole future, and yours in it.
How I try not to stare at your lips too much, for fear you’ll get offended.
How I wanna touch the tip of your nose and kiss it as if to tell you that I’ll always care.
You may find it romantic or you may find it cheesy… But good cheesy I hope.
You make me want to imagine what lies under your clothes. I mean your body is without a doubt unforgettable and your swagg is incredible, but you have me wondering.
What it’ll feel like to run my fingers on your chest.
What it’ll feel like to shower it with kisses.
What it’ll feel like to stare at you while all of this goes down.
What it’ll feel like when the scent of your cologne that I know so well, tickles my nose.
What it’ll feel like to be under your armor: those arms so strong. Those arms that already make me feel like I will be protected and not have to go another painful thing in life.
If you don’t mind, I’d like to call you my boo thang. My best friend even.
I wanna share with you my secrets.
I wanna share with you what I’m too embarrassed to show anyone else.
I wanna be goofy with you.
I wanna get tickled and picked up by you.
I wanna sleep in your arms and wake up to your beautiful face.
If you don’t mind…
I wanna listen to you.
I wanna learn about what makes you who you are.
I want you to be able to share with me all the things that you’re too afraid to show anyone else.
I want you to never think less of me like I won’t of you.
If you don’t mind…
I know it’s a lot to ask, it may not rhyme or make any sense, it may not be the best piece of poetry you ever heard but if you don’t mind… I’d like to call you MINE.
I’d like to do things with you that you never did with anyone else.
I’d like you to think the world of me because I’ll only give you the best of my world. The world I want to share and make one with you… If you don’t mind.

Follow me on twitter @NickyDee_
https://rawrirock.wordpress.com

Why do I always fall for the impossible?

A Topsy Turvy World

He sat on the edge of her bed. Even though there were a million flowery scents in the air, the room still reeked of death. There was nothing there for anyone to find except a torn page out of her diary, brutally ripped in anger or anguish. It was written in a flourish or a frenzy of emotion, but it was old. Not truly a suicide note, not anything else.

It was just a excerpt out of her life. It was just a glimpse into the depths of her soul. It was benign text born out of some turmoil. It was a treasure of words won after a bloody battle. It was a useless piece of death. It was nothing. It was everything. It was the only thing.

He had visited her room ten times before for a clue to any foul play. He found none. Every single visit just…

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The Lady With The Broken Heart

I haven’t blogged in a while School has been keeping me busy, but to tell you the truth, I needed a break from writing anyway. To get situated in my own mind and feelings. I experienced a shutdown and my imagination refused to work. So I gave it time to do whatever it wanted and mainly, I gave it time to rest.
To say the least, I was told a story and I think it is only right I share it with you. Hopefully you feel for the lady with the broken heart as much as I do. I pray that she may find meaning to her life again and that she may be blessed with the gifts of healing and hope. Those are my wishes. Hope you enjoy this one!

I once knew a lady
A lady whose heart ached so badly
A lady whose heart was profoundly wounded
If it were to be opened, you could see the scars that yet had to be healed
She had been put through so much pain
Part of it was her fault. And she blamed her big heart
A heart that never lost the ability to love
A heart that always yearned to bring light in someone else’s life
And as a result, that same heart is now dying
Dying of unimaginable pain.
Time after time, this lady gave her heart to foolish unconscious men who only toyed with it
She gave them everything she possibly could –
She judged it was necessary because she had so much love to give
Time after time, she failed to give them what they needed
Because you see, they left her alone, lost, confuse, with no answers,
One left her to die
One left her as she cried herself to sleep every night
She watched one build a life with someone else
One left her as she wondered whether he loved her back
One left her as she silently prayed he would answer her calls, her pleas for answers –
Part of it was her fault.
Because she loved TOO HARD. She loved BLINDLY. She gave SO much. She gave TOO much. She gave EVERYTHING. She gave TOO soon. She gave WITHOUT BARRIERS.
And it is costing her more than was ever willing to bargain for.
This lady whose heart aches so badly
I watched losing her mind slowly
As she cannot make sense of anything anymore
As she lost the taste for life itself
I wish someone would have warned her
I wish someone would have protected her
All she ever wanted was give herself to ONE man. Surrender her MIND, BODY & SOUL. Love him and promise happiness everlasting to him and him only.
She wanted to shower him with everything he could ever dream of and more. She wanted to be the woman of his dreams. The woman he would always love, trust, and be faithful to. The woman whom he’d see as a precious gem he would never let out of his sight. The woman he would protect, even if it meant he’d die doing just that.
She wanted him to look at her with so much love that it would suffocate them both. And that when their bodies joined together, it would be with such powerful force, that time would stand still.
You see, this lady, although her heart was broken many moons ago, she never stopped trying to find someone to give her love to.
That’s where she went wrong. She didn’t need to try… for anyone.
She tried for the wrong people. She tried for people who weren’t worth it. People who didn’t have the decency to be honest with her. People who were facing their own demons and didn’t have the mental ability to refuse to accept her love – because they wouldn’t be able to reciprocate it. Instead they selfishly took advantage of it all.
See these men fooled her, led her into believing that something would come out of their union. They tricked her into investing her mind, body, energy and time into them. They were not decent men. Because decent men were the men she read about in romance novels.
Decent men know what they want and they do not lead one to deceit.
As she told me her story, I felt for her.
Because she is convinced she no longer has anything good to offer any other man. The ones who came before took everything. And left her with nothing. And she could not do anything because part of it was her fault.
The lady with the broken heart is convinced that her latest fling left her unable to ever get her heart to function the right way again.
The lady with the broken heart, as she shed some tears, told me she just wants her heart whole again,
She only wants her heart back so she can peacefully go on with her life.
And I agree that she deserves that much.
From the looks of it, she will do everything in her power to get that.
I am glad I will be an asset and of help to her. I only tell this story because it may save you or someone you know from getting to this point.

Published by Me
Written by NickyDee
Twitter : @NickyDee_

Meaning

“The definition of friendship”

What you mean to me and what I mean to you is indescribable. It’s full of expressional variation that condensed from the encounters we interact in. What we think and do towards each other is that of our emotional bliss that revels within to cultivate out beings. What we share is beyond what human can define as interpersonal relations. You’re my sisters, you’re my best friends. The one who knows me, the one who defends in my absence. You’re my counterpart that protects my being and stands at my side in majesty.

One of a kind I say,

Two of a kind I see

Bonded together we create a stigmatic force which compels others to our love and power

-Jess Moore